Cecilia's Parenting Resources

This website is dedicated to my dear and funny friend, Bonnie Bedford, who died on July 11, 1997. Bonnie was a fiercely devoted Radical Mother. Her commitment to improving the parenting of the children in her world reached far and wide thanks to the Internet. Her physical presence on the planet will be missed by thousands; and, although, quite tragically, Bonnie's Radical Mother website is no longer being maintained on the Web, Bonnie will continue to affect our world through our memories of her wisdom and wit. Bonnie will long be mourned by her 'net friends all over the world and by her four children, partner and "real life" community. Bonnie's legacy of education and support lives on for women with breast cancer, too.

• Any good parenting resources page should probably start off with childbirth since that's how most of us came to have children in our lives.
  • The Bradley Method is a fabulous way to prepare for natural childbirth. I am a certified/affiliated independent Bradley childbirth educator in Jacksonville, Florida and surrounding areas.
  • ASAC - Association for Safe Alternatives in Childbirth, a group of Canadian parents and healthcare professionals who share the belief that childbirth is a normal, healthy part of life and of special significance to the pregnant woman and her family
  • Birthing Options: Hospital, Home, or Birth Center? Midwife or Doctor?, an excellent article by Cordelia S. Hanna, BA, CCE, CBA
  • One way to help ensure that your birth experience is what you want it to be is to hire a labor assistant or "doula". Read about the role of doulas on the Doulas of North America - DONA International site. If you're in the Jacksonville, Florida, area and you're interested in hiring a doula, please e-mail me at birthyourwayjax [at] bellsouth.net for more information or click on my doula page. I myself am a certified birth doula (DONA), and I can put you in touch with other area doulas, too!
  • Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon
  • The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer
  • Mother's Intention: How Belief Shapes Birth by Kim Wildner
  • The Complete Book of Pregnancy and Childbirth by Shelia Kitzinger
  • Mothering the Mother : How a Doula Can Help You Have a Shorter, Easier, and Healthier Birth by Marshall H. Klaus
  • A Good Birth, A Safe Birth : Choosing and Having the Childbirth Experience You Want by Diana Korte
  • Pregnancy Childbirth and the Newborn : The Complete Guide by Penny Simkin
  • Silent Knife : Cesarean Prevention and Vaginal Birth after Cesarean (VBAC) by Nancy Wainer Cohen & Lois J. Estner
  • Birth Without Violence : The Book That Revolutionalized the Way We Bring Our Children into the World by Frederick LeBoyer
  • The Birth Company provides doula trainings, referral to doulas, and information on creating a better birth experience.
  • Birthing the Easy Way - Learning the Hard Way by Sheila Stubbs
  
  
  
• I am a strong advocate of feeding babies what nature intended them to have in their early years - their own mother's milk. I truly believe, as virtually every early childhood nutrition expert does, that "man-made" synthetic imitators of breastmilk ["formula"] are grossly inferior to "woman-made" breastmilk. Breastmilk is the original *REAL THING* (my apologies to CocaCola's marketing department). Furthermore, I believe strongly in child-led weaning, and both of my children breastfed until they were ready to stop. Here are some links to good breastfeeding information:
  
  • If you find the language in my introduction to this section unusually strong, read "Watch Your Language!" by Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC
  • La Leche League International
  • The American Academy of Pediatrics February 2005 Policy Statement: Breastfeeding and the Use of Human Milk
  • kellymom.com: Breastfeeding and Parenting is a fabulously comprehensive website. I can't even tell you how often I refer to it or recommend it to someone who asks me for help!
  • The Birth Den, a fabulous resource that includes a page dedicated to the wisdom of Dr. Jack Newman
  • Excellent guidelines on how much a breastfed baby needs, how often to feed, how many wet and soiled diapers the baby should have each day, etc. From Best Start: Ontario's Maternal Newborn and Early Child Development Resource Centre
  • Breastfeeding is Normal - a fresh new site with great resources for the breastfeeding mom, advocate or educator
  • I'm Made of Mama's Milk by Mary Olsen - a very sweet book about breastfeeding and what it means to the lucky baby
  • "Breastfeeding: Good For Babies, Mothers, And The Planet" by Alicia Dermer, M.D., I.B.C.L.C. and Anne Montgomery, M.D.
  • "Thoughts on Breastfeeding" by Dr. Katherine A. Dettwyler, Associate Professor of Anthropology and Nutrition at Texas A&M University
  • ProMoM - Promotion of Mother's Milk, Inc.
  • "What Every Parent Should Know About Commercial Infant Formula" by Katie Allison Granju
  • Breastfeeding Online - Articles, Advice and Encouragement by Cindy Curtis, RN, IBCLC
  • "Breastfeeding: A Feminist Issue" by Penny Van Esterik, Coordinator, Women and Work Taskforce, World Alliance for Breastfeeding Action (WABA)
  • Nursing Your Baby by Karen and Gale Pryor
  • The Complete Book of Breastfeeding by Sally Wendkos Olds and Marvin Eiger
  • The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding from La Leche League International
  • I've heard women give a hundred reasons why they just "couldn't" breastfeed. Here's my response to those women
  • A little levity about nursing in public


• If you're a working mother, you may be thinking you will have to wean your baby when you return to work. That is very rarely true... please read on...
  
  • Breastfeeding and the Working Mother: One Mother's Experience - my own account of how and why I combined working and breastfeeding
  • Nursing Mother, Working Mother : The Essential Guide for Breastfeeding and Staying Close to Your Baby After You Return to Work by Gale Pryor. This book is a *must* for working, nursing mamas!
  • University of Florida Researcher: Working Full Time Does Not Deter Breastfeeding Mothers
  • Managing the Milk Supply from 43,000 Feet is one woman's personal experience with combining breastfeeding and business travel. This article is very informative and humorous, and it illustrates that even mothers who travel as part of their jobs can continue to breastfeed with determination and prior planning.
  • The Traveling, Working, Nursing Mom is another story of the personal experience of a working, breastfeeding mom who successfully maintained her milk supply and provided milk to her baby while she was traveling for business. Quite inspirational!
  • AP-WORKS - an email list for working, breastfeeding mothers


• If your baby is a boy, you may be trying to decide whether or not to circumcise him. Before you make any decisions about subjecting your one or two day old son to surgery, I sincerely hope you will take some time to inform yourself about circumcision by visiting the following sites. I wish I had had access to more information about circumcision before my son was born. I would have made an entirely different choice if I had known then what I know now. I am providing these resources so that you will have the opportunity to make a more informed decision.
  • NOCIRC site
  • Mothers Against Circumcision
  • Foreskin or Against It? - an American man's evolving view on circumcision


• When you get that baby home (or if you're already home because you chose a homebirth), you may wonder about sleeping arrangements. The best choice, in my well-researched opinion and in my own practical experience as a parent, is co-sleeping, also referred to as the "family bed." If you're interested in knowing more about the family bed, check out the following:
  • "Moving a Child Gently to His Own Bedroom - A Gradual, Child-led, Transitional Approach", my own essay on gently transitioning an older child into his own bedroom
  • "The Family Bed - An evolutionary approach to family sleep", by Katie Allison Granju
  • The Family Bed by Tine Thevenin
  • "Go Ahead -- Sleep With Your Kids", a Slate E-zine article by Robert Wright


• As your child grows older, you will be faced with decisions about how to discipline him or her. This is another area where education and information are extremely important to effective and healthy parenting. I don't believe in anybody hitting anybody else or otherwise inflicting physical harm on others. I certainly don't think children should be hit by the people they most love and trust in the world. For further information, check out these sites:
  
  
  • No Spanking Zone - well-researched articles about physical punishment and suggestions for alternative means of guiding your little loved ones through life
  • Kids Are Worth It! : Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline by Barbara Coloroso
  • Dr. Mom's Parenting Guide : Commonsense Guidance for the Life of Your Child by Marianne Neifert, MD
  • Some of my own personal opinions on and experiences with punishment and discipline
  • Primal Parenting: Do We Have to Keep Repeating the Past? - a thought-provoking article by Pat Törngren about how the way we were parented affects the adults (and parents) we become


• All of the above parenting topics are somewhat related to a general parenting philosophy that has been called Attachment Parenting. If you'd like to know more about this parenting style, that's a good place to start. There are links to attachment parenting sites all over the Web. You might also try the following books and sites:
  
  
  • The Natural Child Project is a good site to explore. There are lots of wonderful, informative articles on parenting as well as links to numerous parenting websites.
  • Attachment Parenting: Instinctive Care for Your Baby and Young Child by Katie Allison Granju
  • The Baby Book : Everything You Need to Know About Your Baby from Birth to Age Two by William and Martha Sears


Children who are well-nurtured learn good nurturing skills themselves.
Here my 10 year old son Trevor carries his 3 week old
nephew Justin (my grandson!) in a Maya Wrap sling (2002)

• If you breastfeed and co-sleep, you're gonna save a fortune by avoiding buying a lot of useless baby furniture and artificial baby milk so maybe you'll be interested in some of the products sold by several of my "business associates" - friends who work at home and/or have their own commercial websites. The products and services cover a wide range and include such things as nursing bras, nursing wear, slings, kids' clothes/shoes, books, cloth diapers, gifts, photographs, and job search tips.

• My children and I love to share in the joy of music. Here is some personally tested and recommended Music for Kids and Their Parents.



• Here are some more of my own personal meanderings related to parenting.

Please email me at ceciliamiller [at] bellsouth.net if you have any questions about any of the issues addressed on this page.

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